The most nerve-wracking aspect of travel? Speaking a foreign language

The most nerve-wracking moments I have when travelling to a country that is not English-speaking is trying to speak with a local person. I’m in a dilemma. Do I try the few words I know of Spanish, German or French – and risk making a fool of myself – or default to English since chances are they will have better English than I their language? Sure, tour books and travel experts suggest speaking in the local tongue. Easier ‘said’ than done. I have long been studying French, German and Spanish (Duolingo). But when I get to Spain, Germany or France (or even Quebec) my mouth clams up. Partly it’s being thrown into a situation where I have to dredge up a language vocabulary on the spur of the moment and try to remember the words. It induces panic. And after fumbling with one or two words I default to English or, just as often, the other person converts. Then after a few minutes and away from the scene, I remember perfectly well what I could have said. So, despite at least a knowledge of several dozen words and phrases each in French, German and Spanish – and about five in Greek! – the only ones I tend to remember are very basic ones but at least deliver for the most common interactions. “Excuse me”, for example, is “Entschuldigung” in German and “Discuple” in Spanish. "Good day" in German is “Guten Tag and” “Buenos dias” in Spanish. “Breakfast” is “Frühstück” in German and “Desayuno” in Spanish, not to mention “Petit dejeuner” in French though a Quebec friend says that’s not the term used there. The most Spanish I have spoken was recently in Mexico City where surprisingly very little English is spoken. It forced me to recall as much Spanish as I knew. My hotel room shower didn’t have cold water so it was, “La dircha (should be ducha) tiene solo agua caliente.” It really got the point across and I congratulated myself on speaking a complete sentence. In fact, I love it when someone doesn’t speak English since it makes me use that country’s language. But I still feel uncomfortable even using extremely common terms like “have a good day” - in French “Bonne journée.” My Quebec friend makes goodnatured fun of my lack of French. One time I tried to speak in full sentences and he burst out laughing. So, as you see, you can’t win in the “language wars!” Finally, I feel guilty when it’s the other person always having to default to English, as if I’m a privileged English person who doesn’t have to do any of the mental work. I have one friend who waltzes into countries and never tries to speak one word of a foreign language and I think how rude. But maybe they've concluded it just isn’t worth the hassle. Rick Steves suggests always have a vocabulary of a dozen or so words and foreigners respect when you speak their language. I agree. But the difficulty, embarrassment and anxiety of trying to speak another language is something never discussed in travel guides. For me, it’s always been the most awkward aspect of travel. 

- Ron Stang, Windsor Ontario Canada, a frequent traveller